There is a Process for Everything
There are just some days when everything feels like it is falling apart. The emotional chaos seems too much to bare, and the reveal of how deeply painful it all is plunges you down into the darkest cave. You try to see light and hold on to all the inspiration you have memorized and planted. The “everything happens for a reason,” “there is a lesson in everything,” and “trust the universe,” all feel so shallow, your faith and belief are clouded. What are you clinging to that is holding you in this vibration and preventing your joyous energy to flow? What if the one thing that you are holding on to so intensely is, when let go, the very piece that will balance everything else into place, and the flow of ease will be restored?
This is what I have been thinking about, wrestling with, trying to accept, and then do. Let go. But what exactly are we letting go of? I have many incredible friends that have an amazing and beautiful energy that drips of love, unconditional love. The cynic in me just wants to kick that idea right out the door. But on second review of my own personal situations and what I need to let go of, it is about surrendering to your soul and allowing the powerful energy you have to flow and carry you with creativity and drive. In relationships, it is understanding that the ultimate giving is through unconditional love and that sometimes what someone asks of you may be difficult but you do it because of your love for them. We let go of all that is not our soul. We let go of anything that is holding us back, creating chaos, disturbing our inner peace.
Then the question is, how are we to let go? There is a 12-step process for everything – except for letting go. Addiction and recovery applies to all aspects and facets of life. Where is our 12-step process? And it is a process. Identify, Understand, and then feel the feelings of what it is that you need to let go of. Here is the hard/good part: the anger, betrayal, disappointment, hurt, sadness, despair, disbelief… you must feel all of it. There is also the disengagement from whatever it is that we are trying to release and move on from. It is all a process and we must allow it all to process through. There is that word again, process. Process, process, process. PROCESS! So now what do we do. Wait like we have ordered the item “let go” – there is processing time for the order and then it will be a certain amount of time until we are delivered? The process of letting go is much like grieving or mourning – for a lost love, friend, part of one’s self… one would think that denial is a big step in the letting go too. But truly what good does that do? And aren’t we asking the universe to help us let go of anything that is not for our greater good? It is our dreaded ego that is in the way now. So we must strip off all the layers of that too – let’s add that in. Identify, Understand, Feel the feelings, Deny everything, strip down all the layers that are causing you to deny and sabotage your ability to let go…. And now comes the really interesting part. Think of yourself as Humpty Dumpty. You sat on the wall, had a great fall, and are in pieces. How do you put yourself back together? And in a stronger, more enlightened, aware and awake way?
I recall being at a religious service where as the service came to a close, the woman leading the service called out each letter of the alphabet one by one, and we responded by calling out words and concepts for each of those letters, things we wanted to have in our life, energies we wanted to have running and threaded into our souls. A – abundance, awareness, amazement… B- belief, beauty, benevolent, bountiful… C- caring, clarity, compassion, creativity…. And so on. It was like the energy of those ideas, the vibrations and frequencies of those concepts and thoughts, embodied us, and we carried them with us, forward into our stream of life.
There is also a beautiful Japanese custom that I read about – Kintsugi – when ceramic pieces have suffered damage and are cracked or broken, the repair is made by filling the cracks and mending the piece with gold. This brings light and strength to the whole of the piece. We are that. We are all broken and cracked by every life experience we have. Our hearts, our souls, our minds are all broken open to new ideas, new experiences. It is up to us to fill those cracks and breaks with precious things; bind ourselves together with positive energies and light, allowing those places to move from vulnerable to strong, healing with resilience.
So I urge you, myself, us all to find the process of releasing that which does not serve us. Let go of the pain and fill the cracks with love and kindness. Let go with courage knowing that there are wonderful energies waiting for you. Trust the process? Trust that you can release and then be replenished and nourished with all things love. Trust that you will be delivered to a place of peace.
Jill Alman-Bernstein is an Intuitive Empowerment Coach, Soul Realignment Practitioner, inspirational writer, freelance editor and writer’s coach, deep sea soul diver, mother, and mermaid. She is the creator of the platform I Must Be A Mermaid focusing on inspiration, empowerment, personal growth, and transformation.